Chapter 055

Chapter 55: Feeling It Is Unfair for Mother

“Grandmother, you must come back early,” they urged, unwilling to part.

“Yes, we are not at ease at all,” another added, worried.

As they were about to leave, the several of them gave the Grand Matron a thousand instructions. Not one of them was at ease.

The Grand Matron, however, was unconcerned and waved them off: “You have practically hauled half the household here for me. The physician is here, and plenty of medicinal herbs too. What could possibly happen. Go on, go on.” She thought, amused, that they had better not delay her fishing.

Faces clouded with worry, they climbed into the carriage, praying that the Grand Matron would be safe and sound here and return to the manor without mishap; otherwise the three of them would truly be unable to gain a foothold at home.

Once the carriages rolled away, the Grand Matron let out a breath and told Gan Lu, cheerfully stubborn: “Not one of them lets me rest easy. It is rare to go out, and they still want me back so early. I am not going back.” To return was to be shut up again within those walls; the treasures in Chun Rong Hall were many, but she had looked at them long enough. What was more, the manor now, if not a den of foul air, was at least anything but peaceful. She still wished to live a few more years and had no desire to manage the younger generation’s affairs.

“I know they all covet my few possessions. When I get back, I will divide some among them so they stop dropping hints every time they speak in front of me.” She meant Tang Gang; she held no hope for this son of hers and thought him only a vexation.

Gan Lu lowered her voice, cautious: “News just arrived. The Marquis has taken a maid to his bed. No status given. He is probably waiting for the lady to return and decide.”

The Grand Matron’s brows knit tight; for a moment she almost chased after the carriage. “That wretch knows exactly how to jab at a person’s heart.”

Gan Lu, too, thought Tang Gang foolish, yet she still had some hope for Madam Wang and ventured: “The lady has always been magnanimous, so perhaps…”

“It is only when she neither quarrels nor cries that there is something truly wrong,” the Grand Matron said coolly. “If a woman really does not mind at all, her heart has died. Once a woman’s heart dies toward a man, she looks only to interest. Ignorant men preen themselves and think the woman sensible.” She took a long breath. She had said all that should be said these few days and helped that wretch as much as could be helped. At the age when one might be a grandfather, how much more could an old mother manage.

The Grand Matron went off to fish, but her thoughts wandered.

In the carriage, Madam Wang praised Tang Mo to Xin An and told them to do whatever they wished; if Tang Gang tried to obstruct them, they should come to her. She said, mild but firm: “I used to value reputation and made the second boy suffer more than once. I will not do so again. With me here, no one will bully you.”

Xin An nodded with a smile: “Mother, tell me about the households in the capital. It will not be long before I must go out and call, and it would not do to be blind to everything.”

“We must indeed speak properly. There are many taboos,” Madam Wang said, taking no secrets to the grave, “so let us start with the visit next month to Duke En’s manor…” She told Xin An everything she knew, and Xin An listened carefully. [In her previous life, she had suffered exactly for lack of this kind of knowledge. Madam Wang had not troubled herself to teach her much then; most of what she learned came from Auntie Cai, who, as a servant, knew only so much. Because her information was stale and narrow, she made a few social blunders, and for that Tang Rong disliked her even more.]

By evening, their carriage reached the gates of the marquis’s manor. The steward hurried out to receive them and quietly sent someone to inform Tang Gang. With neither the Grand Matron nor Madam Wang in residence to steady the household, Tang Gang had been living very free these days; he had not even come back the previous night.

“The Marquis is out on business and has not yet returned,” the steward said warmly. “When he hears that my lady has come home, he will surely be delighted.”

Madam Wang smiled without comment. She had long since lost heart over Tang Gang, yet she did even better at putting on a gracious face. She said pleasantly: “Since the Marquis is busy, do not disturb him. Has anything occurred in the household these days?”

“All as usual,” the steward answered with a broad smile. “Several households have sent invitations for banquets and await my lady’s decision. There are also a few base ledgers that require my lady’s own review, and next month’s allowance list is out…”

Madam Wang acted as if nothing at all had happened and set to work on the household’s affairs as soon as she returned. Tang Mo, whose mood had been decent, darkened at once. [He spat at Tang Gang in his heart, felt bitterly that his mother lived too constrained a life, and secretly hated his own lack of ability.]

Before they even reached Qiu Shi Courtyard, they saw the courtyard full of servants waiting; at their head stood Nan Feng. Tang Mo’s brow tightened. [If she dares covet me again, I will make sure she pays.] As they came near, Nan Feng walked up with a smile, and he was about to flare up when Nan Feng joyfully bowed to Xin An and said: “Young Madam has returned. Young Madam has worked hard. Hot water is ready, and the small kitchen has bird’s nest simmering; it will be done shortly.”

Nan Feng had managed Qiu Shi Courtyard these few days, and her look made it clear nothing untoward had happened. Xin An smiled: “It was tiring, but seeing you laugh so happily, I am no longer tired. Prepare a few light dishes later.”

“It has already been ordered,” Nan Feng replied, attentive at Xin An’s side throughout, without so much as an extra glance for Tang Mo. Tang Mo’s face soured further. [Do I have any status left in this courtyard.]

Qiu Shi Courtyard was as usual. Washed and refreshed, Xin An lounged on the beauty couch and asked for a full account of the past few days. Nan Feng, who had served in the manor for many years, was skilled at gathering news and reported everything. The situation next door did not surprise Xin An; a woman’s husband’s home and her natal home were different things, and with mother-in-law and sisters-in-law away, it was perfectly normal to invite one’s own mother over to talk. Meeting a few boudoir friends was normal as well. Only Tang Gang’s business of sleeping with a maid was enough to make one roll her eyes.

Tang Mo almost exploded, but Xin An stilled him with a single glance. After confirming the details, the bird’s nest was ready. While eating, Xin An said evenly: “That is your father. Can you manage his bedchamber affairs?”

“I just feel it is unfair for Mother,” Tang Mo muttered, jaw tight. Why had his mother gone out to ease her mind. He remained unrepentant at home and only grew worse. It was disgusting.

Seeing that Xin An still had the appetite for bird’s nest, he asked, baffled: “You do not feel angry?”

Xin An was not angry. She lifted her eyes and said: “The world is unfair to women. Do you think this happens only in a marquis’s manor. Go and ask around. Men in their seventies and eighties still keep concubines. They call it red sleeves to add fragrance, call it vigor in old age; they treat it as a man’s badge of pride. Who has ever cared how women feel.” She added with a level gaze: “If you make a scene in public, they say you are the one who lacks sense and is unfilial.”

Tang Mo drew a deep breath, a thorn of curiosity pricking: “Then are women truly so magnanimous?”

“What else can they be?” Xin An set down her bowl and said quietly: “Let a woman voice even slight displeasure and she is labeled jealous and lacking in virtue, and the label sticks to her children as well. Unless she truly cannot bear children and fears the line will be cut off, what woman wants her husband to take a concubine.”

She concluded, tone cool and clear: “All the beautiful hopes end up becoming a partnership to get through the days. Once it is a partnership, the expectations change. If he does his part well, you hope he lives a long life. If he does poorly, you hope he dies early so he stops blocking the way.” Then she encouraged him with a faint smile: “If you want your mother to live with dignity, you have to do your work well. If you achieve real standing, even your father will have to watch your face; he will not dare take concubines lightly.”

Tang Mo’s mouth twitched as he sighed: “In your eyes I am just the one who does the work, am I not.” [What a realistic woman.]