Chapter 148

Chapter 148: A Chaotic Morning

Yu Sheng was woken up very early by a phone call from Little Red Riding Hood.

He blinked himself awake and saw two Irenes, one hanging off the foot of the bed and one sprawled across the nightstand. Honestly, no normal person could imagine how two dolls ended up sleeping like that. His phone buzzed nonstop by the pillow, and the moment he answered, Little Red Riding Hood’s urgent voice rushed out: “Yu Sheng! You died!”

Yu Sheng jolted fully awake. [What a way to start the day.]

His first thought was that high schoolers really needed better manners. His second thought was to figure out how he might have offended this young lady. One early morning call, and the amount of shade in her words was enough to fill the sandbox at their orphanage.

The next second, Little Red Riding Hood caught herself and babbled over her own confusion: “Ah, sorry, that’s not what I meant, my brain is a mess. I mean I saw you dead… no, I remembered you died… wait, that’s not right either… ok this one’s right, I just remembered…”

She really was flustered, but her confusion helped Yu Sheng figure it out. He had seen the same reaction with Irene. So he cleared his throat and cut in: “Hold it, hold it, you don’t have to explain. I get it. Good grief, no wonder there was a layer of ‘Evil Wolf’ in the way during the handoff. The delayed effect on you is really delayed.”

Little Red Riding Hood went quiet, probably thrown off by how calm he sounded. After a few seconds, she spoke again: “Why are you so calm?”

“Because I knew you’d remember sooner or later. Anyone who has touched my blood can sense my ‘revival’. The same thing happened with Irene and with Foxy,” said Yu Sheng as he sat up and gave her the short version. “Anyway, that’s the deal. No need to panic. Good news is, next time you visit No. 66 Wutong Road, you won’t need me to do Door Opening. You’ll be able to see my house by yourself. Bad news is, the next time you watch me drop dead right in front of you, it might hit you pretty hard, because the forgetting rule won’t work on you anymore.

“But it isn’t a big problem. Irene and Foxy are used to it now. I’m used to it too. See it a couple of times and you’ll be fine.”

The phone went quiet again. Little Red Riding Hood was probably still tangled up, with her worldview lagging behind her thoughts and her thoughts lagging behind her ears. Meanwhile, the two Irenes, one hanging from the bed and one on the nightstand, stirred thanks to the phone noise. The two dolls lifted their groggy heads and greeted him: “Good morning… yawn.”

Then they both fell to the floor. They had been balancing there by pure luck anyway.

Yu Sheng reached out and picked up the Irene who fell off the nightstand. She rubbed her head, still half asleep, and mumbled a complaint: “You and Foxy were too much yesterday. You two ate barbecue while I could only watch, and then you parked me by the fire to roast like a piece of meat…”

“That was to dry your clothes,” said Yu Sheng, giving the doll a look. “Who told you to fall into the pot?”

“You still shouldn’t have put me on a spit!”

Yu Sheng thought for a beat and said: “Yesterday is over. We should look forward.”

Irene yelped and sprang up, but she only got halfway before Yu Sheng palmed her head and pushed her back down. He waggled the phone: “Little Red Riding Hood called. She’s the same as you and Foxy now.”

Irene blinked. She didn’t get it for a second, but a few moments later she guessed it: “It just took effect?”

“Just now, and I think it scared her,” muttered Yu Sheng. “High schoolers these days don’t accept things very well.”

Right as he finished, Little Red Riding Hood’s voice finally returned through the phone: “I don’t think this is about acceptance. Even someone with great acceptance would react like this after dealing with you.”

Yu Sheng burst out laughing: “Got your thoughts straight?”

“Mostly,” sighed Little Red Riding Hood, then she asked with curiosity: “So how many people know this ‘secret’ of yours now?”

“I don’t even think it’s a secret, but there’s a weird ‘rollback’ rule, so it can’t be helped,” said Yu Sheng casually. “At the moment it’s you, Irene, and Foxy, you three. In theory Xiao Xiao could know too, since she shared my blood. But I haven’t died in front of her yet, so she still doesn’t know…”

He didn’t finish before Little Red Riding Hood cried out: “Don’t scare the child!”

Yu Sheng couldn’t help laughing: “Come on. I’m not crazy. Why would I choose to drop dead on purpose in front of a kid just to spook her?”

Little Red Riding Hood’s voice carried some grievance: “What if you feel like trying it?”

Yu Sheng went speechless: “…”

[What kind of image do I have in her head? Don’t tell me I’ve already fallen from ‘mature, reliable, steady lord’ to something else.]

Right then, his phone buzzed again with another incoming call.

“Okay, I’ll stop here. The Special Affairs Bureau is calling,” said Yu Sheng after glancing at the caller ID. He spoke quickly to Little Red Riding Hood: “Anything else on your end?”

“No. The biggest thing is suddenly knowing you died. Go take care of it.”

Yu Sheng thought that sentence sounded wrong and felt like a bad sentence without context. He grumbled in his heart, hung up on Little Red Riding Hood, then answered the new call: “Hello, this is Yu Sheng.”

Bai Li Qing’s voice came through: “I hope calling this early didn’t wake you?”

Maybe it was his imagination, but Yu Sheng heard a hint of payback in that calm line.

“No, I just woke up. Is the lab arranged?”

“Yes. The analysis lab is ready. An expert team is on standby. The files you asked for are prepared,” said Bai Li Qing, steady and reliable. “If it works for you, a car will pick you up in thirty minutes.”

“Thirty minutes? Works for me.”

Yu Sheng ended the call, checked the time, and then got up to dress and wash. He grabbed two small combs and tossed them to the two little dolls: “Hurry up and get yourselves ready to head out. Today we’re going to the Special Affairs Bureau to learn something new. And wake Foxy, or we’ll have no time for breakfast.”

The two Irenes sat on the bed and started combing each other’s hair. They didn’t move otherwise: “No need to wake her. I think she’s already eating. I just heard sounds in the kitchen downstairs…”

Yu Sheng spat out his toothpaste foam, froze for a second, and then reacted at once: “Oh no! The braised meat I left in the fridge!”

“Let it go. You’re definitely too late now,” said Irene, trying to comfort him. “And to be fair, you also stashed most of the wolf carcass inside her tail. This ending was decided from the start.”

Yu Sheng sighed long and hard, and he had to admit she was right.

When he and Irene went downstairs, Foxy was hugging the pot at the dining table, dazed, the look of someone who had eaten too much. Beside the sleepy fox girl, a fresh, steaming breakfast sat on the table. It was last night’s picnic leftovers, reheated to perfection with Fox Fire.

“Benefactor, I warmed breakfast,” said Foxy with a sunny smile, proud and happy.

For a moment Yu Sheng didn’t know if he should be touched. If he was touched, well, this living bottomless pit had eaten most of the braised meat. If he wasn’t touched, then even this girl, who lost all reason around food, had still saved him a full plate and picked out the best items. She hadn’t taken a single bite.

Twenty minutes later, all set, Yu Sheng left home with Irene and the now fully awake fox girl. The three of them squatted neatly on the curb in front of No. 66 Wutong Road.

Irene glanced left and right at Yu Sheng and Foxy: “Does this count as our entire organization going out in full force?”

“Not really. You’re only half out,” said Yu Sheng. “You left one body at home watching TV.”

While he spoke, he looked at the fox maiden: “Foxy, don’t brace your hands on the ground. It doesn’t look proper.”

“We’re already squatting on the curb, why are we talking about proper or not?” muttered Irene. “Also, why do we have to squat?”

“How would I know? I squatted to tie my shoe, and you both followed me down.”

Irene blinked: “…?”

Just then, a clanking, wheezing engine rattle drifted from the end of the street and cut off their chatter.

Yu Sheng stood up fast and looked over. A beat-up, at least seventh-hand Xiali wobbled toward them.

His face turned complicated at once.

When the little car finally shuddered to a stop in front of them and the window rolled down to show Xu Jiali’s face, Yu Sheng couldn’t help saying under his breath: “Why is it you again?”

Irene was even blunter: “Doesn’t your Special Affairs Bureau have a bigger car?”

Xu Jiali looked embarrassed, clearly knowing the state of his ride: “Uh, they weren’t going to send me. The car coming for you broke down halfway, and I happened to be nearby, so they reassigned me.”

The corner of Yu Sheng’s mouth twitched. He could only squeeze into the ragged backseat with Foxy and Irene. The passenger seat was still taken up by that mysterious big box. As they crowded in, he muttered: “How is such a big organization this short on resources? Your field car broke down on the way?”

Xu Jiali looked awkward and sighed: “What can we do. The Machine Spirit wasn’t feeling it.”

“You can’t use a higher-end way to describe your Machine Spirit?” asked Yu Sheng.

“This sounds friendly. Machine Spirits in different places have different styles and preferences,” explained Xu Jiali with a dry laugh. “At the Academy, the Machine Spirits are more gothic. When dealing with them, you say things like ‘the Machine Spirit is displeased’ or ‘Machine Spirit praise’. That might match your impression better.”

Yu Sheng paused: “Uh… then what about Machine Spirits here in Borderland?”

“Here, the Machine Spirits are more like buddies,” said Xu Jiali.