Chapter 002
Chapter 2: The Arrogant Old Servant
Hearing his voice through the carriage wall, Xia Meng Yan felt her heart seize for no reason. In her past life, she had adored that young general with all her heart. Even when she knew he loved someone else, she told herself that if she was patient and loved him enough, one day he would see her worth.
But later she saw how one word from Huo Ying Zi could make him throw her aside. Only then did she understand: ice will melt, just not for you.
Some people and some things are already set. If you keep forcing it, you only make yourself look more humble.
So when she and the baby died, she decided to let go.
Chun Yue looked worried and asked: “Madam, are you all right?”
[She senses that I am different.]
After washing off the dust of the road and wringing her hair dry, Xia Meng Yan lay down on the bed at the inn. The candlelight was warm and orange, not the bloody red she saw before death in her last life. Her tight fists slowly loosened. She let out a long breath.
[I really am alive again.]
Heaven has eyes. Since she had been given another chance, she would never make the same mistakes.
Just as her heart relaxed, a horse neighed outside the inn.
Chun Yue stepped to the window and said softly: “Madam, the marquis is here with Nanny Cheng.”
Xia Meng Yan’s eyes narrowed and she asked: “Nanny Cheng?”
Chun Yue nodded, her brows full of relief as she said: “Yes. Nanny Cheng is a midwife and very skilled at delivering babies. The marquis brought her. He must be worried about you and the little young master.”
As she spoke, a matron lifted the curtain and entered. Unlike most stout old servants, she was a bit taller and thin, and the hands that showed beyond her sleeves were bony and strong, full of force.
Old words from her past life rang in Xia Meng Yan’s ears, each one a knife.
Back then, Nanny Cheng had scoffed and said: “Having a baby is not that delicate. I have not even used any strength yet.”
She had sneered and said: “A spoiled young lady like you cries at the smallest thing. No wonder the marquis dislikes you. The one he treasures is my young lady. Do you know where the marquis is now? He is discussing tactics and formations with my young lady.”
She had lifted her chin and said: “Do not think giving birth will change anything. Any woman can give birth. But a woman like my young lady, who can lead troops with the marquis, is one of a kind.”
Then those iron hands had pressed down hard on Xia Meng Yan’s belly, and the pain had turned her sight black.
The light dimmed as someone stepped in front of the candle, and Xia Meng Yan snapped out of the nightmare of her past life. Nanny Cheng stood against the light. Her thin face looked even colder and meaner.
“Madam is with child,” Nanny Cheng said in a cutting tone. “How can you act so willful? You made this old slave search everywhere. I almost lost half my life.”
Xia Meng Yan raised her eyes and looked at her quietly, saying nothing.
Chun Yue hurried to smooth things over and said: “Nanny Cheng, you have worked hard. Please sit.”
“Do people behave like this at Huo Manor too, Nanny Cheng?” Xia Meng Yan asked in a slow voice, cutting in.
Nanny Cheng was halfway to sitting when the words hit her. She snapped: “What?”
Xia Meng Yan’s eyes were black and steady, the candle’s flame dancing in them as she said: “You entered without being announced and complained about your master in public. Your old life still being safe until now is not easy luck.”
Nanny Cheng’s face changed. She hid anger under a respectful tone and said: “I came out of respect for the marquis to check on the child in madam’s belly. If madam does not appreciate it, this old slave will take her leave.”
“You want to leave? Take your punishment first,” Xia Meng Yan said with a soft laugh that allowed no refusal, then added: “Chun Yue, slap her.”
“Whose face are you slapping?” Lin Ye Lan strode in, impatience on his face.
Nanny Cheng bowed at once with a wounded look and said: “Marquis, it is my fault. I am clumsy and cannot win madam’s favor. I made madam unhappy. Please let me go back.”
Lin Ye Lan frowned, his eyes full of irritation as he said: “Nanny Cheng is an old retainer of the Huo Family. Even I must respect her. What more do you want?”
Xia Meng Yan had stood the moment he came in. She faced him head?on. In her last life she never saw him before she died. After her death, when he saw her body, what did he feel? She guessed he was glad, because then he could be with Huo Ying Zi openly.
She smiled at herself and said: “A midwife of such standing in the Huo Family, someone even the marquis must respect, is not someone I dare to employ. I was raised in a court scholar’s house. I do not know war, but I know rules. I have never heard of a house servant who must be treated with respect by the master. Besides, my child is far from due. What I need is an imperial physician, not a proud midwife.”
Nanny Cheng’s brows twitched as surprise flashed in her eyes. On the road, this marchioness had been delicate and timid. Nanny Cheng had mocked her now and then, and she never talked back. What was this change today?
Anger rolled in Lin Ye Lan’s chest as he said: “Xia Meng Yan, stop with the sarcasm. If you blame me for hurrying the march and not stopping at inns, just say so. Do not drag Nanny Cheng into it. I told you long ago that this trip to Northern Fortress Pass is official business, not a trip for pleasure. You insisted…”
“Yes, I insisted,” Xia Meng Yan said, stepping forward to cut him off. “Rest easy. I will not drag you down. You go on to the Frontier Garrison. I will return to the Capital. We will go our separate ways.”
Lin Ye Lan pinched the bridge of his nose and forced his anger down as he said: “You are pregnant. I do not want to argue. Apologize to Nanny Cheng. Let her examine you. Rest one night. We leave tomorrow. Xia Meng Yan, this is my biggest compromise. Take it and stop.”
Cold gathered in Xia Meng Yan’s clear eyes. In his gaze she could see a tiny, living version of herself, and she said: “You want me to apologize to a servant? Lin Ye Lan, Marquis of Ping An, you may not care about your pride, but I still care about mine.”
“You,” Lin Ye Lan burst out, “are impossible.”
Xia Meng Yan smiled instead of getting angry and said: “Since the marquis thinks so, then write a memorial and ask for a decree to dissolve the marriage.”
Lin Ye Lan froze and stared at her in disbelief as he said: “What did you say? Dissolve the marriage? Xia Meng Yan, what nonsense is this? Our marriage was granted by the emperor. How can we end it so easily? Even if you are willful, there is a limit.”
Xia Meng Yan sat on the bed, lowered her lashes, and said calmly: “I am not being willful. I speak from the heart. Marquis, go to the Frontier Garrison and give it your all. If you earn military merit, you can ask for a reward and trade it for a decree to dissolve this marriage. It might work.”
Words and feelings jammed in Lin Ye Lan’s throat. He could not swallow or spit them out. He never imagined the words “dissolve the marriage” would come from Xia Meng Yan.
Was she not the one who loved him deeply? The one who had to be with him always, who followed him from the Capital to Northern Fortress Pass even while pregnant?
Nanny Cheng’s eyes darted as she stepped forward and said: “Madam, do not speak in anger. Using divorce to threaten the marquis is a poor plan. Husband and wife should be of one heart.”
The words jolted Lin Ye Lan awake. Right, how could Xia Meng Yan want to end the marriage? She was only putting on airs to force his hand and throw a tantrum.
“Fine,” he said. “If you want to return, suit yourself. I do not have time to send you. Figure it out on your own.”
He turned to go, glancing at Xia Meng Yan from the corner of his eye. She did not move and did not try to stop him. Heat flared in his chest, and his steps thudded on the floor.
“Wait,” Xia Meng Yan said.
She walked forward quickly and, before anyone could react, slapped Nanny Cheng across the face.
Nanny Cheng stared, clutching her cheek as she cried: “You… you dare hit me?”
Xia Meng Yan sheltered her belly with one arm and kicked Nanny Cheng’s shin. Caught off guard, the woman dropped to her knees. Xia Meng Yan said in a cool voice: “I told you already: slap her.”
“Xia Meng Yan,” Lin Ye Lan roared.
Xia Meng Yan stepped back a few paces and leaned against Chun Yue. Her eyes were icy and calm as she said: “Do not shout, marquis. You will scare the child.”
“You,” Lin Ye Lan growled, shooting her a final glare before snapping to the matron: “Move.”
Nanny Cheng hurried after him. At the door she turned and shot Xia Meng Yan a vicious look.
Xia Meng Yan lightly stroked the jade bracelet at her wrist and said, voice cold as ice: “Chun Yue, call Guard Song.”