Chapter 001
Chapter 1: Figured It Out
The carriage jolted along the road, and the richly dressed woman inside fluttered her lashes as she woke, her eyes clear as autumn water and still hazy with sleep. She turned her head a little; three thousand strands of black hair fell like a soft waterfall, and her porcelain?pale skin, caught by the gold of the setting sun, looked smooth and warm like fine white jade.
The two maids waiting on her went blank with awe. Even though they served the madam every day, they were still struck now and then by her beauty.
She looked around and asked in a quiet voice: “Where are we?” Her clear gaze shifted into shock.
Chun Yue hurried closer, saying: “Madam, you’re awake. Was the carriage too bumpy? Please bear with it. In one more day, we will reach Northern Fortress Pass.”
Xia Meng Yan sat up fast and repeated, startled: “Northern Fortress Pass?”
Chun Yue grabbed her arm in fright and said: “Madam, slow down. Your months are getting along. The physician told us your movements must be gentle.”
Xia Meng Yan lowered her eyes and saw the slight rise of her belly. She pushed open the window; outside stretched a barren plain.
[Wasn’t I dead?]
[Could it be… rebirth?]
[Reborn on the road, on the way to Northern Fortress Pass with my husband?]
She had been the only daughter of Court Scholar Xia, raised with care. The emperor had granted her marriage to the young and promising Marquis of Ping An. Their union matched in status and was praised by all as perfect.
She had believed that too. She loved her husband to the bone. Even when he was sent to Northern Fortress Pass, she insisted on following him in spite of her pregnancy, so she could care for him while he was busy at the Frontier Garrison.
She had not known that Huo Ying Zi, daughter of Marshal Huo at Northern Fortress Pass, once had a hazy romance with him. He had admired Huo Ying Zi for a long time, but she left the capital with her father to take up duty at Northern Fortress Pass, and the two were parted.
In her past life, after they reached Northern Fortress Pass, her husband met Huo Ying Zi in secret again and again, while she remained in the dark. Near her due date, Huo Ying Zi suddenly disappeared, and her husband rushed out like a madman. No matter how she begged, he would not stay with her. She grew too upset and went into early labor, and they brought in a midwife.
That midwife worked for Huo Ying Zi. While Xia Meng Yan struggled through a difficult birth, the woman bent to her ear and whispered all about the marquis and Huo Ying Zi, how they had met under the moon these past nights at Northern Fortress Pass, and in the end… mother and child both died.
[And yet here I am, alive again.]
Chun Yue saw terror in the madam’s eyes and her face turn white, and asked in a rush: “Madam, are you all right? Do you feel unwell?”
Xia Meng Yan steadied her breath and said, though her voice trembled a little: “I’m fine. Bring me a cup of warm water.”
“Yes.”
Warmth touched her fingertips, and Xia Meng Yan’s churning feelings slowly calmed. She sipped the water and began to plan.
[That shameless pair, a couple of trash. Let them chain each other for life so they do not harm anyone else.]
Her hand rested on her belly; the ice in her gaze softened into tenderness as she thought: [Child, last time your mother failed you. You died before you even saw this world. This time, I will see you born safe.]
Only, to cut ties with those two would not be easy. The emperor had granted the marriage, and she was with child.
Even so, Xia Meng Yan grew very calm, because she had already decided what to do.
After some time the carriage stopped. Chun Yue lifted the curtain to look and then said with happy relief: “Madam, we’ve arrived. I will fetch the marquis to come see you.”
Xia Meng Yan answered without emotion: “Go.”
She did not need him to put on a show of concern, but there were things she wanted to make clear.
A quarter of an hour later, with the sound of hooves, a man in soft armor rode over on a tall horse. His sword?like brows slanted up, and sharp light hid in his black eyes. When he saw Xia Meng Yan, his thin lips pressed down, and a hint of displeasure crossed his clean?cut face. He sat straight in the saddle, tall and lean like an eagle flying in the night, proud and cold with a pressure that allowed no refusal.
Xia Meng Yan’s mouth curved in a bitter line. That look was too distant. It was not how a husband should look at his new wife, especially not at a wife carrying his child.
She kept her tone even and said: “Marquis, I asked you here to discuss something with you.”
Lin Ye Lan, the Marquis of Ping An, answered with a severe face and clear impatience in his eyes: “What now? I told you the Frontier Garrison is harsh. You are the daughter of a civil official, pampered and not used to hardship. You could have waited for me in the Capital. You insisted on coming. All the way here you complained about this and that. What else do you want?”
Xia Meng Yan gave a small, mocking smile. [Can’t stand hardship? Wait in the Capital? Right. If I stayed in the Capital, you and Huo Ying Zi could flirt in the flowers to your hearts’ content.]
[But now, I do not want Lin Ye Lan at all. Why would I ever be jealous for him?]
She kept her posture respectful and said: “You are right, marquis, so I have figured it out. I will go back now.”
Lin Ye Lan paused and asked: “Go back?”
“Yes,” she said. “Before, I ignored my pregnancy and insisted on coming, because I wished to take care of you. Now that I have cooled down, I see you do not need me. Northern Fortress Pass has plenty of talent. How could there be no one to care for the marquis? I worried for nothing. I will return first.”
“Stop being ridiculous.”
“How am I being ridiculous? Life is hard at Northern Fortress Pass. Life in the Capital is easy and comfortable. Why would I throw away good days to come suffer? Am I right, marquis?”
“You…”
“In the past I did not understand and thought husband and wife should share hardship,” she said. “But on the road I learned the marquis does not appreciate it. Since that is so, I see no need to suffer for nothing. Going back to enjoy a quiet life is better.”
Lin Ye Lan’s brows drew tight as anger rose: “We just met and you are already unreasonable. If you knew this, why make this trip at all?”
Everyone in the Capital knew Xia Meng Yan liked him. Otherwise, the emperor would not have interfered to grant this marriage. She had just conceived his child, and now her true nature showed. He thought, darkly, that she meant to control him with the child. He would never allow that.
Xia Meng Yan dropped the curtain, and her cool voice came from inside the carriage: “Turn around. We return to the Capital.”
Though she had traveled with the larger group, all her food, clothes, maids, and driver were her own people. At her word, the driver swung the carriage, the wheels rumbled, and they truly headed back.
Lin Ye Lan clenched the reins until his palms burned, but could not stop the fire in his chest. [This woman. With Northern Fortress Pass right ahead, she starts trouble again.]
He spurred his horse and caught up, forcing his temper down to the last thread as he called out: “Xia Meng Yan, what do you want?”
“Return to the Capital.”
Two words, firm as nails, stopped his horse short.
“Fine,” he snapped. “Go back if you want. I never planned to bring you. But do not expect me to escort you home.”
Xia Meng Yan gave a short laugh and said: “You have not cared for me at all along the road. There is no need for the marquis to worry about the trip back. I will arrange it.”
Then she raised her voice toward the front: “Faster. If we hurry, we can reach the inn before dark.”
At dawn, Lin Ye Lan had ordered a full?speed march and a night in the open, and Xia Meng Yan had kept up, passing inns without stopping. Now she only wanted to reach an inn, rest well, settle her thoughts, and plan for the future for herself and her child.
“Xia Meng Yan,” Lin Ye Lan shouted, furious.