Chapter 18

Chapter 18: What the Hell—Can a Dragon and a Dog Breed a Monkey?

Huang Da Zhuang’s roar nearly rattled Jiang Tea Tea’s skull. She pulled her lightbrain away from her ear and winced. “Huang Big Dog. Lower your voice. Don’t get so excited.”

“I’m on my way,” she added lazily. “I’ll be there soon.”

Huang Da Zhuang snorted. “You lie without even blushing. You’re not on your way. You’re clearly still in the dorm.”

Jiang Tea Tea paused, then said smoothly, “No, no. I’m on my way. I’ll be there soon. Soon.”

Huang Da Zhuang’s voice went eerie. “We’re on video call. I can see your dorm.”

Jiang Tea Tea jerked her wrist up and checked.

Voice call.

Not video.

She narrowed her eyes. “You’re bluffing me now?”

“Bluff you?” Huang Da Zhuang snapped. “His Highness Chong Ming arrives at eight! It’s already seven-thirty. Get your ass over here!”

Jiang Tea Tea clicked her tongue and ended the call.

She glanced at the time.

Seven-ten.

He was exaggerating like his life depended on it.

Still, she moved at her own pace. She washed her face, took a quick shower, and changed into a clean uniform. By the time she stepped out, it was only seven-twenty-five.

The moment she opened her door, she ran into Sui Xuan Chu.

He was dressed the same as always: blue-black Combat Department training uniform, high ponytail tied with a red cord, red-black horn buds. Cool, cold, and radiating a don’t-touch-me aura.

Jiang Tea Tea lifted a hand in greeting. “Morning, roommate.”

Sui Xuan Chu frowned like she’d spoken nonsense, then gave her one word. “Morning.”

Jiang Tea Tea walked on.

Sui Xuan Chu fell into step behind her without a word. They took the elevator down together, left the dorm building, and climbed into a hover car heading toward the school gate.

The Royal Military Academy had been cleaned obsessively for Chong Ming’s arrival. Buildings gleamed. Pathways were swept. Even the trash cans were empty.

Students who weren’t in the official welcome lineup still swarmed the gate. Those with no classes went early to watch. Those with classes sat in classrooms unable to focus, minds full of one thing: male idol.

When the hover car stopped near the gate, Jiang Tea Tea looked at Sui Xuan Chu in surprise. “You’re here to welcome His Highness Chong Ming too?”

Sui Xuan Chu rolled his eyes. “What else would I be doing?”

Jiang Tea Tea laughed softly. “His Highness really knows how to put on a show.”

Something flickered in Sui Xuan Chu’s gaze. Then he said, flatly, “Yeah. He puts on a show.”

Jiang Tea Tea hopped out and started walking. “Big shots are all like that. If they don’t act like big shots, it’s like people won’t believe they’re capable.”

Sui Xuan Chu glanced at her. “How many big shots have you even seen?”

Jiang Tea Tea waved her hand. “A lot.”

Sui Xuan Chu’s lips twitched, amused despite himself. “Is that so?”

“Of course—”

“Ancestor! Ancestor! Why are you only getting here now?!”

Huang Da Zhuang barreled over like a missile, grabbed Jiang Tea Tea’s arm, and dragged her toward the front. “The principal, vice principal, the discipline director—every big shot is waiting up there!” he hissed. “And you’re still dawdling!”

“I’m not dawdling,” Jiang Tea Tea protested as she was hauled along. “His Highness arrives at eight. It’s only seven-fifty!”

Huang Da Zhuang looked ready to have an aneurysm. “Seven-fifty isn’t early! I’ve been here since before seven!”

Jiang Tea Tea shot back, deadpan, “If you’re dumb, whose fault is that?”

Huang Da Zhuang choked.

She was dragged into place, and before she could regain her balance, someone shoved a bouquet into her arms.

Several staff members started firing instructions at her—smile, stand straight, if His Highness asks something answer nicely, don’t embarrass the school—

Jiang Tea Tea heard none of it.

She recoiled from the bouquet like it was a weapon and held it as far away from her body as possible.

A bouquet was essentially a bundle of plant reproductive organs.

A tree demon being forced to carry that around and present it politely? Criminal.

“Here! His Highness’s flyer is here!”

Someone shouted.

The entire crowd fell into instant silence. Heads snapped up toward the sky.

Jiang Tea Tea squinted.

A golden flyer descended, escorted by eight fighter jets. Three flyers flew in front as lead escorts, and three followed behind. The formation looked less like a flight and more like a declaration: the sky itself belonged to him.

Jiang Tea Tea lowered her gaze and spotted Sui Xuan Chu standing beside her.

Everyone else stared upward.

Sui Xuan Chu stared down at his boots like he was bored.

Jiang Tea Tea elbowed him lightly.

Sui Xuan Chu lifted his eyes. “What?”

Jiang Tea Tea nodded toward the sky. “His Highness brings the whole army for a school visit. Fighter escorts, flyers leading and covering the rear. Is he that afraid of dying?”

Sui Xuan Chu’s mouth twitched. “You really have no basic common sense.”

“His Highness Chong Ming is the Supreme Commander of the Imperial Armed Forces and the Prince Regent,” Sui Xuan Chu said coolly. “He’s above tens of thousands. What you can see is only what he lets you see.”

“What you can’t see,” he went on, “is countless invisibility satellites, invisibility ships, and invisibility protection units.”

He glanced at Jiang Tea Tea, voice flat. “If he wants, even the two of us gossiping here can be locked onto. He can see and hear everything clearly.”

Jiang Tea Tea’s eyes widened like a country bumpkin hearing about fire for the first time. “Seriously? That amazing?”

Sui Xuan Chu didn’t bother hiding his disdain. “High tech. Invisible to the naked eye, radar, heat sensors.”

“Don’t bother staring,” he added. “You’ll go blind before you see anything.”

Jiang Tea Tea laughed twice. “Thanks for the reminder.”

The golden flyer touched down.

Soldiers disembarked first, fully armed. Their bodies were hard, their eyes sharp with lethal intent.

Then the main door opened.

First came black combat boots.

Black military trousers. Long legs. A belt. A shirt. A long military coat.

Golden hair catching the light. Golden dragon horns. Golden eyes.

And a face so sharp and handsome it looked carved rather than born.

The principal and the academy leadership hurried forward to greet him.

Huang Da Zhuang grabbed Jiang Tea Tea’s arm, trembling with excitement like a puppy about to explode. “Sister Tea! Sister Tea! Oh my god—my idol! My male idol! I’ve never been this close!”

“He’s so handsome. So cool. So alpha,” Huang Da Zhuang babbled. “I want to give him flowers. I want to marry him. I want to have monkey babies with him!”

Jiang Tea Tea turned slowly, eyes wide with genuine horror. “Huang Big Dog,” she said, reverent with disbelief, “you’re a dog. He’s a dragon. You’re both male.”

She gestured vaguely at the universe’s rules. “In this interstellar age, has tech advanced so far it broke reproductive barriers? Dragon-dog hybrids can produce monkeys now?”