Chapter 161: Irene’s World-Shaking Culinary Art
After hearing Yu Sheng’s reply, Little Red Riding Hood said nothing. She simply sat quietly upon the grassy plain, as though lost in thought—or perhaps just dazing off.
Quite some time passed before Yu Sheng heard her mutter softly, “It’s really quiet here. No Squirrels, no Wolf Packs.”
“The way you said that makes it sound like bad luck is about to hit,” Yu Sheng glanced around nervously, his gaze eventually returning to the girl. “Uh… are you alright? You look kinda tired.”
“Of course I am, I’m a High School Student,” Little Red Riding Hood rolled her eyes. “And I fell asleep during chemistry class.”
Yu Sheng hadn’t expected such a grounded answer. He froze for a moment in surprise. But the girl didn’t wait for his reaction. She chuckled and shook her head.
“I didn’t want to go to school at first. Especially after my Awakening, when I learned what was coming… I had a huge fight with my Guardian. You probably heard us yelling… Sounds kind of stupid now, doesn’t it?”
Yu Sheng remained silent.
But Little Red Riding Hood didn’t care whether he responded.
“Now, I find myself having the same kinds of arguments with the younger kids,” she went on. “They just can’t understand why the Orphanage insists on making them attend classes, study books. If they’re lucky, they’re sent to a normal human school by special arrangement. If not, they still take lessons from the Teachers within the compound. For most of them, those lessons will never be useful. They won’t graduate, won’t get jobs, won’t get the chance to become a designer, a technician, or a driver…
“Honestly, they’re right. It is a waste of time—if you only look at the fact that each child here only gets a decade or so of life.
“But the Guardian who once took care of me said that living means having hope. If this world offers us no hope, then something is wrong with the world. But whether we choose to hold onto hope—that’s on us.
“There’s very little we can control in this world. Most things won’t unfold the way we want. So in the end, the only thing we can really claim as our own… is our mindset. Though even that’s hard to control.
“She also said that it’s hard to live a complete life. But we can at least try to make our years before adulthood complete. She told me not to smoke, not to drink, not to stray down dark paths. She told me to learn things, to see how vast the world is. She said it’s easy to fall—to give up is the simplest path. So we should challenge ourselves. Like trying to be a good student…”
She kept talking, more and more, before exhaling deeply and falling back onto the dim, yet soft, grass beneath her. She gazed up at the equally gray sky.
“It wasn’t some great philosophy she taught me. She wasn’t good with grand ideals. She was only eighteen when she left… never even got a driver’s license.”
Yu Sheng turned to look at the girl lying on the grass. “But she raised you well.”
“Not that well. I still ignored half of what she said, like not getting into fights. Some of her ideas I still don’t agree with… But what can I do? I can’t argue with her now anyway.”
“True.”
Silence returned between them.
Little Red Riding Hood continued to stare at the gray sky, zoning out. Eventually, she broke the silence again.
“It really is peaceful here…”
“You said that already.”
“No, I mean—this dream of yours is so dull. Is this it? Just grass? Shouldn’t dreams be… more bizarre, more twisty? This place feels like… the afterlife.”
“Now you’re being picky?” Yu Sheng twitched. “What’s wrong with a quiet dream? If you’ve had enough rest, just climb somewhere high and fall backwards. That should wake you up. Or I could call Irene to kick you out. That method works 100% of the time…”
“No thanks! I’d rather get bonked awake by Teacher Su’s chalk!” she waved her hands in refusal. “You’re right, though. A quiet dream isn’t so bad. When I doze off like this, I always worry I’ll end up back in the Black Forest. Didn’t expect I’d find some peace in your dream.”
Yu Sheng pouted—but just then, he caught a strange scent.
“Do you smell something?” He wrinkled his nose and glanced at her. “Weird smell. Kinda pungent.”
“Nope,” she sniffed, “Just smells like grass to me. Maybe it’s your sinus acting up.”
“No way. Smells like something burning.”
“You’re imagining things. My nose is sharper than a dog’s…”
She didn’t get to finish that sentence. Yu Sheng suddenly sprang to his feet, panic on his face.
“Oh no! The kitchen!”
Little Red Riding Hood: “…Huh?”
But Yu Sheng’s figure had already vanished.
In the next instant, Yu Sheng’s eyes snapped open. As he turned over, he felt the floor vanish beneath him—and dropped straight onto a heap of fluffy tails.
The crackling static was like winter-blooming flowers, and if one could read the language of these blossoms, they would say: the household’s Cyber Fox Immortal probably possessed a Lightning Cultivator root.
Yu Sheng let out a wail and sprang up from the tails, slipping on the sleek fur and nearly smashing his skull against the sharp corner of the tea table. Had he landed just a bit harder, it would’ve been at least half an hour before he could investigate the kitchen situation—but miraculously, he survived. Clumsily, he sprinted out of the living room and toward the kitchen Door. The moment he pushed it open, he was hit by an overwhelming scent of burnt food.
Amidst it came Irene’s panicked scream: “Ah ah ah! Water! Water! It’s on fire! My dish is burning… I’m burning too!”
Yu Sheng lunged forward, grabbed Irene—who was standing on the stove with flames licking up her skirt—and hurled her into the sink. He quickly turned off the flame, smothered the wok fire with the lid, and flung the windows open to ventilate.
Wutong Road No. 66 was safe again.
Miss Foxy cowered in the kitchen corner, neck drawn in. Irene lay sprawled in the sink, face blackened, water gushing from the faucet, her little doll body slowly beginning to float.
Yu Sheng stood dumbfounded in the haze of dispersing smoke, brain lagging behind his body’s automatic emergency actions.
Then his phone buzzed twice. A message from Little Red Riding Hood popped up:
“I’m awake. Got caught by the Teacher. She woke me up with a chalk missile. So mad.”
Yu Sheng replied with a cheering emoji, then scratched his head as his gaze swept over the kitchen.
“So, uh… can anyone explain what just happened here?”
Minutes later, Irene was hung by both sleeves on a laundry pole out on the balcony, water dripping from her charred frame. Yu Sheng stood beside her, operating a large hair dryer, making the little doll wobble like a leaf in the wind.
As the drying went too slowly, Yu Sheng eventually brought over a space heater and set it beside the drying rack.
“You… you didn’t have to hang me up. I can dry myself,” Irene murmured cautiously, watching his expression. “I can even flip myself over.”
“I didn’t hang you up to make it easier for you,” Yu Sheng replied flatly. “I did it so you’d remember this.”
“R-right… got it.”
He stared sternly at the pitiful Doll Lady, then, after a long beat, sighed in resignation and helped her down.
She immediately scampered onto the space heater, sitting cross-legged as soft wisps of steam curled off her body.
Now Yu Sheng understood why she hadn’t noticed her clothes were catching fire—
She didn’t fear heat!
“I appreciate you guys wanting to help with cooking,” he finally said with a sigh, “but you almost set the whole kitchen ablaze. That’s kinda terrifying. I mean, it shouldn’t have gone this wrong. Foxy, aren’t you usually fine heating food?”
“I… I usually use Fox Fire,” Miss Foxy mumbled, curling her tail protectively around herself, ears drooping. “But Irene said she wasn’t used to that. She insisted on using the gas stove… and she wanted to do the wok flip performance…”
Yu Sheng blinked and turned to the Doll Lady—now shrouded in steam like some celestial being ascending.
“You… tried to flip the wok?”
Irene chuckled awkwardly, her face still smudged with ash.
“That wok is nearly as tall as you are! You tried to flip it?! Who was flipping who?!” His brows shot up.
Irene gave a sheepish grin and shifted her posture atop the heater, still smoking slightly.
Shaking his head, Yu Sheng walked over and plucked the little doll from her seat.
“Hey, what are you—”
“No more roasting,” Yu Sheng sighed, carrying her toward the bathroom. “Just remembered—you should probably take a bath first. You’re marinated in smoke and soot.”
Dangling by her collar, Irene looked up at him. “So… you’re not mad anymore?”
“You think I’ve got the energy to stay mad all day?” Yu Sheng chuckled dryly. “Alright. At least you didn’t burn the place down. I’ll check the kitchen again in a bit… see what we can still make for lunch.”